The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly.

I cried a lot yesterday.  Adoption is not easy...but the best things in life are far from easy.  We received an email that our adoption along with everyone else was to be pushed back another 3-6 months.  They wanted to ensure ethical practices.  That is why I went with my agency.  They are built on being ethical.  I hold this very close to my heart as does everyone I know adopting.

So while I respect the reason whole heartedly, my heart drops for my sons.  I wanted them home.  I wanted to hug them, rock them, feed them, sleep with them.  I had envisioned the best 31st birthday in March with all 4 of my babies.  It hurts.

I sat and read the email for the 10th time hoping it said something different, and I got a text.  A girlfriend of mine who has been at this longer than our family was sending me bible verses to stay strong.  "And we know that in ALL things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose.  If God is for us, who can be against us?" Romans 8:28  God has a purpose, and His purpose may not make me happy at every turn, but His purpose is far greater than my happiness.

If everything would have gone the exact way I wanted it...my life would be much different.  I would be in agony, because God has much more wisdom than I could ever dream. 

I continue to be so thankful I am on this journey.