Please Pray.

How do I express our heartache over such blindsiding news?

We were traveling in a couple of weeks.

We packed some of our suitcases, and tried to get as organized as possible not knowing our exact path.  I would peak into our bags everyday and smile at all the clothes and toys that were awaiting our children and so many others.

Friday night, I went to dinner with my family.  Once home came the terrible news that the country in which we have adopted suspended allowing adopted children to leave the country.

I instantly felt a stabbing pain in my stomach.  I called my family in tears.  That night I laid awake downstairs and tried to get some sense of understanding.  I look at their faces and dream of the day they will smile.

I am hurt.  I am angry.  We have fought for our children for so long that I am emotionally drained.  I question everything.  I can't understand why.

We were notified of more news that leads to another setback this afternoon.  I am trying to pray myself through it, but I will be honest and tell you it is difficult. 

I know my blessings are overflowing.  I know what true despair could look like, and I continue to be grateful to God and Jesus.  We just need your prayers.  Not to understand it all, but some sense of peace.  Every day away is lost time with all 3 of our beautiful children.  We are trying to take this day by day, and looking to our Father for guidance.  Thank you for praying for our family, and please remember to send me specific prayer requests as well.