"Only Light Can Do That."

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that." Martin Luther King Jr.
 

One of my favorite quotes to live by. Is it hard to live by? Yes. Light and love can be hard to do when you are angry.

I saw a mom at the park wearing sweatpants. My immediate thought was, "Now that's my kind of girl." I like to roll that way too. She was holding her baby, watching her daughter play. My kids were on cloud nine, climbing ladders and ready to slide down some massive slides. Cealy ran to me within seconds of them playing. "Mommy, the girl over there told my brothers that she didn't like black people." What?!? I was in shock.

My heart sank. Nooooooo. This did not happen down the street from my house and at their favorite park. No way. Not this early. I had not even talked to Cealy yet about racism. She had no idea people on this earth felt that way.

Although the first thought that came to my mind was anger, I took a breath and asked Cealy to walk with me for a minute. We found the little girl (maybe 5 years old) who said such harsh and dark words. I asked her why she said it. "I'm sorry," was all she could say with a smug look that was not apologetic. Another breath. "Would you like to play with my kids? That are really sweet and fun, and I think you would have a good time." I am pretty sure Jesus took over my tongue and spoke for me, because I felt like saying something quite different. "Sure," she said. She ran over to her mom for a minute with tears in her eyes. I think she thought I was going to be meaner than I was. Her mom gave her a juice and talked to her. I am sure she asked what happened and I am sure she told her, but the woman whom I thought was "my kind of mom," turned out to be someone I wouldn't spend 30 seconds with. This woman wanted nothing to do with me, and made sure she kept a good distance.

Later this little girl played with Cealy. She played near my sons but was curling her lip a little much for my liking. What could I do? I wanted to ask her mother why she would pass on such ignorance to a daughter she loves so much. I wanted to explain to this mom how her words affect much more than just her daughter. But in this situation I chose light and love. I tried to show this little girl how my black children slide, swing, run, and laugh just like her. I wanted to give her that experience, because I am sure she hasn't been given it before. Sometimes light and love take more courage. They demand you to invite those in who you want to push out.

Look I have like one million things to learn when it comes to parenting. Everyday I am learning something new. But one thing I know for sure. What you see as beautiful, your children will too. The pictures you hang in your home. The barbies and dolls you buy your daughter. Try buying her a brown or black baby doll to love on. Buy books for your son that have brown or black main characters. Expose your children to all kinds of beauty. Martin Luther King Jr. was a strong, courageous man. I cannot imagine the pain he endured while choosing light and love.